Communication is a growing process and for me it all
depends on the setting. I often find
myself to be more apt to listening with minimum non-verbal expressions when I am
in meetings with professional colleagues, those I supervise, parents and with those who I am not
familiar. When I am with my family and
friends, I tend to tell it like it is as I see it with a lot of non-verbal
expressions.
After this week’s assignments, it has become clear
to me that I need to look at myself and how I can be more effective in my
communication styles so that people truly listen to what I am saying. “You
develop a self-concept by thing about your strengths and weaknesses, observing
your behavior in a wide variety of situations, witnessing your own reactions to
situations, and watching others’ reaction to you (Synder, 1979)”, (O’Hair &
Wiemann, p. 47, 2012).
I grew up learning the Golden Rule, the concept of treating others as you
want to be treated. This is not always
true because others may not feel the way I feel or see things the way I see them. The Platinum Rule, provides a way for others to see how to truly see how people want to be treated without perception. “Competent communicators want to learn and
improve. They are motivated to enhance their ability to relate to others as
they are”, (Beebe, Beebe, & Redmond, p. 107, 2011). This is way it is important to get to know
people and learn of their cultural upbringing without assuming or putting self-perception into play. “The less sure you are of the person’s
qualities, the way the person will behave, or what will happen, the higher that
degree of uncertainty”, (O’Hair, & Wiemann, p. 201, 2012).
References
Beebe, S. A., Beebe, S. J., & Redmond, M. V.
(2011). Interpersonal communication:
Relating to
others
(6th
ed.). Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon. Chapter 4, "Interpersonal
Communication
and Diversity: Adapting
to Others" (pp. 85–114).
O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real
communication: An introduction. New York:
Bedford/St. Martin's.
Pat,
ReplyDeleteThat's an interesting perspective that O'Hair & Wiemann (2012) makes about the qualities of a person. Reflecting upon it, I find that to be true as our initial conversations are probing to determine how and what style of communicating is best to use. Excellent speaking points this week in class and in reflection.
I am appreciative that you realised that the golden rule and the platinum rule have that slight but very major difference. The difference where we understand treating someone how we want to be treated is definitely different to treating someone how they would want to be treated. It takes purposeful effort and commitment to understand an individual in order to achieve the Platinum rule. We as educators or just in our daily lives would find the platinum rule vital in our communication.
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